Reflections on Leadership

Take an inventory of what it is you want.  It is readily available or do you have to go someplace else for it?  Would you?

Maybe you’ve gotten comfortable with all your complaining.  People seem to be giving you pity – and you’ve been playing a great victim.  Keep it up and you could keep doing what you’ve been doing until you retire or die, whichever comes first.

But that’s no way to live, so how about spending some time working on you.  What do you want to do with yourself?  You’ve got to have a clue. Reach back into your childhood if you need to.

What did you want to be when you grew up?  Why?

Examine that in today’s context.  Is it still appealing?  If not, why not?  If yes, then why the heck aren’t you doing it now?

Go ahead; list your ten best excuses for not pursuing your dreams.  Write them down.  Prioritize them just like you would your goals.  Next, problem-solve them.  Get rid of the barriers.  Those SOB’s are keeping you from your dream.

Think of yourself as an actor on a television show.  You want to contribute toward getting high ratings each week so the show avoids cancellation; you want to get renewed each season.  So, you act and perform in a way that leads to the show’s success and you eventually earn awards.  Remember, you want to be a Highly Valued Star, not a Greatness Inhibitor.

Next up: “Review Where We’ve Been”

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Make sure your network is is not the only thing working.  The fish don’t always bite; the ball does not always go through the hoop. Changing your attitude takes effort too.  What’s going on in your world that you can use to your benefit?

Act like the boy who walked into a room full of horse manure.  While his father grimaced and plugged his nose, the cheery boy excitedly proclaimed, “There’s got to be a pony in here somewhere.

So, get optimistic and turn everything into an upside.  Make a game of it.  When you do, a boring training class coming up becomes a test of endurance.  Got a thick new policy manual to read?  Time to practice speed-reading.  You’re a champion problem solver!  Keep a log of the problems you successfully solve each day.  Track and improve your average.  Measure progress.

You need to make time for yourself.  Take a break from the madness.  If you can get away for a while, great, even for an afternoon or a lunch hour.  Get away from your job and work on something else.  Anything.  Make the best grocery list the world has ever seen.  Wax your car.  Clean your closet.  Play.  Go buy a set of Lego Bricks and build something.  Just make sure you’re active, and that you’re engaging as many of your senses as you can.  Sitting on the couch with a pint of ice cream watching reruns of “Friends” does not count.  You need to move your mind, body and heart. When you’re done, there needs to be something you can look at with that all but forgotten feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction.  Go do it.  Then answer the question below.

What did you do that moved your mind, body and heart?

Next up: “What Do You Want? ”

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It may be time to start looking for something new – tap the network.  Ask for help.  People like helping people reach their goals.  Know your goal.

Goals are easy to find.  What things do you do at work that you enjoy?  Working with people?  Creating presentations?  Analyzing data?  Every time you find that passion, pay attention to yourself and see what you respond to.  Spend more time doing that. Describe how it feels.  Probably pretty darn good.  Enjoy it.  Relish it.  And do everything you can to repeat it.  Ignore, delegate or trade the rest if you can because it’s the passion-inducing moments that are going to give you your happiness and personal success.  People like to follow leaders who are passionate and competent so keep working on your skills and your strengths.

Don’t get lazy.  Just know your strengths.  Dig up any number of personal assessments or ask five people who you interact with daily what they think your strengths are.  Look for themes that are repeated and begin to focus on those things.  Refine your strengths.  Let the others atrophy – you weren’t built to do them anyway so don’t worry about them.

Next up: “Find the Upside”

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When people ask, “how are you?” –don’t mumble, “fine”.  When they ask, “Can I do anything to help?” don’t say “No”.  Seek and ye shall find, ask and ye shall receive.

Very little will drop in your lap.  Come to think of it, the things that normally drop in people’s laps are crumbs and spilled drinks and the answers to your challenges aren’t in that!

Begin to tell people forcefully, calmly, professionally what you need them to do, so you can do your job.  Let them know if they can’t provide excellence, it will be difficult for you to deliver excellence.

Next up: “Ask for Help”

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If you’ve been doing the recommended exercises to this point, you’ve probably been hitting some emotions you didn’t know you still had and hopefully it’s been challenging and invigorating to you.  Hold on to that because you need to pay attention to those feelings and fight for what you need.

Lobby for change.  Be brave and run to things – not away from them.  Operate from a position of inner strength not external weakness.  You are better than the problem that is set before you.

If you’re still working through this you must still care and truly want to make a difference. Good for you!  Now, can you define it?  What is the difference you truly want to make?  You wont have to try hard; the answer is sitting right on the surface.  Something is spurring you on.  There’s a vision you have that is aching to be realized.  Now is the time to breathe some new life into it.

What lofty ideal do you want to achieve?  Don’t be put off by other people’s definition of lofty.  Your vision has to be seen through your eyes first.  Make it crystal clear.

Write down or draw your vision or picture of success.

Next up: “Crumbs and Spilled Drinks”

Tell me how it’s going for you.  Have you been following along these last few days or did you just stumble across this?  Are you scrambling to catch up or have these posts failed to resonate with you?  Share your comments, progress or tips on the blog, on the Karl Bimshas Consulting page on Facebook or on Twitter using the #whiner21 tag.

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It takes true commitment.  Doing “it” even if it’s hard or you don’t feel like it.  The world is filled with enough poor leaders who negatively affect the lives of other people.  You must keep your commitments to others at all costs.

This is about responsibility and applies to anyone who has formal or informal influence over a team of people.  As a leader, people depend on you.  Anyone you come in contact with – you affect or influence in some way.  If you are not totally and completely there, then those influences such as downsizing, or a corporate initiative that everyone knows is foolhardy, will get to them.  It will fester and resentment will grow and that would be catastrophic.

Do not let it happen!  Protect your people by any means required.  Focus on improving their jobs, outlook, and life.  If you’re lucky you’ll feel better about yourself too.  If not, well at least you’re not the dead weight dragging everyone else down.

You might be so completely apathetic as to have adopted the, “so what, I don’t care, what difference does it make?” attitude.  That might be one of your problems.  It’s important that you find something to start to care about.  To know that you, can make a difference – and in fact it’s your human responsibility.

When something is wrong and you know it’s wrong or there is a direct or indirect assault to your values, beliefs, mission, goals or people, you need to fight back.  Do what is right even if it’s not correct.  Find a role – make a difference.  Don’t complain – express.  Take a stand.

Next up: “Check Your Vision”

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Ask yourself, “Why are you still here?” Keep probing until one or more of the three intrinsic motivators are revealed.

1. For personal development,
2. Because of enriching experiences with others
3. Or to work on leaving a legacy.

Why are you still here?

Now define your primary learning style.

1. Is it Action-Oriented? Are you likely to roll up your sleeves and get to it, preferring to learn through trial and error?
2. Are you People-Oriented?  Do you like to confer with others who may have experienced the problem prior to you?
3. Or are you Information-Oriented?  Are you among the first to look for the training manual or some type of documentation you can refer to frequently?

What is your primary learning style.

It’s important to recognize that in business you need to be equally successful in three areas, Customer Satisfaction, Employee Satisfaction and Profitable Revenue Growth.  These are the three legs to the stool that you are resting your career on.  If the stool is wobbling – fix a leg before you fall off.

In which of these areas do you feel you could make the greatest positive impact?

Now, review all the choices that you made and answer the question, “What am I going to do in the tomorrow to get started?”

Review your answers.

Find linkages and hold yourself to your commitments.  Be open to the answers and make it your mission to accomplish the requests of anyone brave enough to provide you with honest feedback

Next up: “Fix What’s Wrong”

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As you begin to realize what it was that you had wanted to do in the first place, you may feel a growing frustration.  Perhaps you feel that the people around you are not moving fast enough.  They’re not making the same self-discoveries that you are and it is beginning to tick you off.

By now you should be convinced that if you continue to behave in the same glum manner you have been acting, you will build momentum and speed toward a much-deserved outcome.  Unfortunately, that outcome will probably not be a positive one.  You’re not doomed, but you need to change your approach toward the people you work with, and it doesn’t have to be complicated.  As a start, in true servant-leadership fashion, you should begin to ask others, “What one thing can I do for you that will most help you make a positive difference?”

You see, you probably owe your coworkers more than you’ve been giving them.  You should ask a few questions of yourself first.  Once you know your own answers begin asking your coworkers’ one on one.  Honestly answering these questions will create a positive and proactive buzz, the likes of which you probably have not seen in quite a long time.  With that newfound energy you can then direct the momentum that will give you far greater odds of reaching a more satisfying destination.  In this activity your leadership – not your management, is crucial.  It is important to reflect on some biblical wisdom that the shepherd is there for the flock, not the other way around.

Next up: “Why Are You Still Here?”

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Here we are, day 7 of my 21-day commitment to help you move from whiner to winner.  Adapted from my book, “How to Stay When you Want to Quit; Re-scripting your life from whiner to winner”, this series takes key pieces from that program.

For two more weeks I will continue to pose a series of questions, exercises and thought starters aimed at helping you, or someone you love to get over it and to start getting to work on something productive.

Please share your thoughts.  I’d love to hear how you’re doing.  Now let’s get into Day 7, “Don’t Blame It On Burnout When You’re The Arsonist”

You may think you’re burnt out, but don’t blame it on burnout when you’re the arsonist!  When you moan and groan to the people who are putting up with you and all your crap and say you’re feeling burnt out, it ticks them off because it’s a load of garbage.  As a human being you are capable of sustaining a lot of real pain and hardship.

You’re blessed with a brain that has the capacity to solve almost any problem set before it.  You are just being lazy.  You don’t want to hear it but at its core it’s true.

Sure it’s hard.  It’s like a bowl of leftover food you come across in the refrigerator.  Maybe you don’t like what you see, but you need to do something with it.  You’ve got choices.

1. You can try to change it into something more palatable.
2. You can choose to ignore it … for a little while anyway.
3. Or you can choose to get rid of it.  Move on and find something else.

The same applies to you and your job.

Which do you choose?

Maybe you’re frustrated.  Sometimes it’s hard to get motivated to do anything.  Some believe people are intrinsically motivated by one or more of three things.

1. Personal growth and development,
2. Enhancing an important relationship,
3. or Working on something bigger than ourselves and leaving a legacy.

What motivates you?

If you need to get better control of your attitude, surrounding yourself with positive people is an obvious start.  Each morning it’s up to you.  You can wake up, drag yourself out of bed, look out the window and say, “Good Lord, it’s morning” or you can hop up, take a deep breath and say, “Good morning Lord.”

Next up: “Making a Positive Difference”

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Believe it or not, people are generally good.  Very few wake up each morning and commit to screwing you in some way.  You need to beware the three donkey day.  If during the course of your day you find yourself encountering three separate people you feel are complete donkeys, then it’s probably you who is being the ass.  Go home and call it a day or take a deep breath and keep your mouth shut before you make a bigger fool of yourself than you already have.

When was the last time you came across three donkeys?

Reflecting back on that day, who was the biggest donkey? (If it wasn’t you, you may want to think again or ask someone who was with you.)

Knowing what you now know, what will you do different in the future?

Next up: “Don’t Blame It On Burnout When You’re the Arsonist”

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