The quote book,“Write Advice; Inspirations, tips and thoughts for leaders and artists”has inspired a new online store. The name might fool you, but it’s not only for writers. You will find gifts that are perfect for any writer, leader or artist in your life who’s ready to make a difference!
Today is opening day for the store (which you can find here) and I’m excited to see some of the top requested quotes and thoughts come to life on the amazing Tee-Shirts and other products.
Below are a few items you’ll find.
A Confident writer is a sexy writer
Never Be Without a Great Goal
Forgiveness Journal
Come by and browse around, I know you’ll find something for yourself or someone you care about!
Have you ever noticed that the people who come to you with bad news often say, “Don’t blame me, I’m just the messenger” or “don’t shoot the messenger”? Creating an environment where people feel safe to share opinions, ideas or air disagreements is crucial for any leader. It’s seldom we ever move forward without some debate on important issues. That’s partly how we know they’re important in the first place.
When someone immediately slips into defensive mode of “don’t blame me” one of two things are happening.
One, you may have a reputation of ruling with an iron fist and that receiving bad news is not welcome. This is not a long term winning strategy by they way.
Or more often, the person sharing the “news” is being a busy body or worse, completely abdicating their responsibility.
Don’t let them get away with it. No one is assigning blame. Be professional. This isn’t a whoever smelt it dealt it scenario. It can be enormously frustrating to work with these non-leaders, but as a leader yourself this becomes a teachable moment.
Don’t let them slink away without asking them for their ideas, suggestions or feelings on the matter. In the event they just are a busy body this with trap them in the realization that they are guilty of having no original thought which will cause them to fluster and quickly and leave. Good riddance.
If they are merely shy or lack confidence, your prompts will provide a safe environment for them to potentially reveal some useful information that you didn’t previously have access too. Thank them for their contributions and move on.
Today is a somber day for me and my family, but with your help I’d like to change that.
A year ago on this date I unexpectedly and shockingly lost my sister to a heart attack. It’s inevitable that the day will be seared in my memory, however I believe a positive remembrance revolved around the way Kathi endeavored to live her life would be more appropriate. She would routinely practice acts of random kindness. I’d like your help honoring her memory by practicing acts of random kindness today. Here’s some ideas:
Smile today. Offer your seat or place in line to another. Feed a parking meter that isn’t yours. Buy a meal or an ice cream for someone. Call or write to a relative and tell them you’ve just been thinking about them.
Spend time outside and appreciate the grand and the sublime. Smell a flower, hold a rock in your hand. Feel the waves wash over you or the sand between your toes.
Get into a new adventure you can tell stories about. Laugh often and embarrassingly loud. Confront a fear or help someone else to do the same. Celebrate life and all the wonder around it. Frolic with a dog or challenge a cat to a staring contest. Listen, really listen to the song of a nearby bird.
A life well lived is filled with triumph and tragedy; tears of sorrow and tears of joy. Today, randomly and often, publicly or privately help bring triumph and joy to others.
Everything in life has features, advantages and benefits.
Features are sometimes called technical specs. These are the things the product or service has. A washing machine with five speeds. The nightclub that provides only A-list performers, the airline that offers warm towels to passengers on red eye flights.
Advantages are the things that the product or service has that others don’t or they provide exceptionally better than anyone else. The washing machine that’s available in four jewel toned colors, the nightclub that has a frequent guest VIP program, the airline that doesn’t charge you for the niceties.
Benefits are the things that people consider valuable. It may not be unique to you, but it’s very personal and it’s how people make their decisions. What’s the benefit? You’re a designer and need a stylish red washing machine, or you collect autographs of top musicians for your ailing mother or you like to go straight to work after an overnight flight and want to feel refreshed and ready to go. It’s easier to make a decision when you know the benefits.
That’s how it works in business everyday. Now, what about you personally? You have to “sell” yourself everyday to prospective employers, customers, maître d’s, loan officers. The list goes on. So, what’s FAB about you? Give it some thought.
What are your Features?
What do you know? What are your core values and beliefs? What do you stand for?
What are your Advantages?
What do you offer your world that others can’t do nearly as well as you can? What skills make others think of you first?
What Benefits do you bring?
What value will the people who are looking for you gain? This takes self confidence. You need to know yourself well, and you’ll need to discover what your audience needs.
Lead with your benefits, this is what people base their decisions on. Then shore up your advantages and features, because if people feel the need to justify their decision about you, that’s where they will look. If you don’t have anything there, they will quickly change their mind. They will look there for validation, so keep them happy. Do the work and you’ll feel FAB.
Here are a collection of my original a-ha’s I first penned fourteen years ago during a cross-county flight. I called them the Seven Simple Truths.
1. It’s better to be good. I don’t mean pious, I mean knowing ethical behavior and common sense manners. Knowing you’re values and acting in accordance to them.
2. Cause and effect works in every event whether we choose to believe it or not. Everything happens for a reason and the reason is a reaction to what has already occurred.
3. We all need to give more. We need to give more of our time, our energy our thoughts, our ideas, our talents, ourselves — more of everything imaginable.
4. Anything is possible. Everything that exists today that was created by man was once a foolish idea that most people thought would never work. The truth of the matter is everything is possible. Every problem is solvable. Every epidemic is curable and every thirst quenchable. We have the power and the ability to abolish poverty, to end starvation, to resolve conflict without bloodshed. With patience, perseverance and focused thinking we can accomplish any goal. It may not be easy, but it can be done.
5. The body and mind must be exercised. The body must guard our mind and our mind must inspire our body. While in this form they rely on each other.
6. Being happy is better than being sad. Both are emotions, and emotions are not right or wrong. They are the by-products of an action. Therefore it’s better to do things that make you positive and upbeat. Always smile, laugh and inquire like a child.
7. Know what you want. It is simply that easy. Just knowing what it is you want to accomplish sends you way ahead of the indecisive pack.
Think more. Do more. Give more. See more. Be more. Laugh more. And know that anything is possible.
Having a vision of success is only part of the equation of achievement; unfortunately it’s where too many people stop. They can see what they want so clearly that it hurts. Yearnings are fine because they move us forward. It’s a different story if the vision we set for ourselves leads to feelings of regret or depression because we’ve not achieved them fast enough.
Some wonder what they’re doing wrong, and why things never seem to work out for them. As a result, despondent people give up on their vision. What they should be doing is asking better questions. Keep your vision. I’d argue, the wilder the better.
If you created your own vision then you know deep within you’re able to achieve it. Today, assume you already have and then figure out how you did it by asking “Forward Reflective Questions” like, “Why am I so successful?” “How did I earn so much money?” or “Where did I find this wonderful person?” As with your goal setting, be as specific as you can in your reflection.
Do you think if you ask questions like these you’re lying to yourself? You might not FEEL successful yet, so how could you ask such a question? It’s easy. Because like Michelangelo’s David, the person you want to be is already in there, you just need to get rid of the things that aren’t serving you anymore. The baggage that someone else unloaded on you and you’ve been carrying all these months or years.
Our mind is a powerful solution-seeking machine. It likes to find answers. So if you question why you’re a failure, you’ll get answers and you won’t like them. It’s better to question why you are a success in whatever you choose to pursue. The answers to those questions may also surprise you and they will unlock a way of thinking that will bring you closer to your vision with greater speed.
Congratulations, you made it. It’s a new day, month, year, and decade. The “first of the year” has arrived, so no more feeble excuses. It’s time to get to work on you.
“But today? It’s a holiday.”
Well Kid, any day you make progress on your goals is cause for celebration so you might as well get started. Do something. Have you written your goals down yet? Have you shared them with a supportive person?
Most Contributed to Success
In a recent survey 38% of the respondents cited Support from Others as a major contribution to their success last year. This was second to old-fashioned Discipline and Persistence.
Of those same respondents, 55% were optimistic about accomplishing their goals in 2010. That’s a good start, although 100% would be better. Those who aren’t sure may be pragmatic or they may be a little too reliant on luck.
How Likely to Accomplish 2010 Goal?
For the nearly 20% who are beginning the year with low confidence there are two choices; break your goal into smaller manageable pieces, or find a new worthwhile goal. If you don’t think you can achieve your goal, how can anyone else?
Working on your goal will not always be easy so begin the habit of asking, “Does this move me closer to or farther from my goal?” If you listen to your intuition, you will always hear an answer. Heed what it tells you and choose to do the things that move you a little closer…everyday. There are 365 days in this year, what you do with them is up to you.
Are you carrying an anger, sadness or fear that is immobilizing you or holding you back? The New Year is a great time to let it go, regain control and invest in you. How would you like to do that in just seven days?
You know that writing is a powerful tool. Did you also know it’s therapeutic? Studies show goals have a greater likelihood of being achieved if they are written down. Problems are also more likely to be revealed and resolved if taken from the head and placed on the page. Below are three of the seven thought provoking questions you can find in the Disposable Journal.
Before you get started, there are a few things to keep in mind. The answers are just for you. You’re under no obligation to share it or any of the insights you discover with anyone. It’s your private exploration. Also, your answers needn’t be perfect. You’re working on improving your attitude – not your grammatical prowess.
Day One – Think and then get it out. What’s troubling you right now? Is it a fear? Are you angry or perhaps sad? Think of your journal as a trusted friend whom you’ve not seen in a while. What do you want to tell it?
Day Two – What’s going on with you? Describe your current state. What are your thoughts and feelings? Who’s to blame; and why do you feel that way? Put it out there and write for a solid twenty minutes.
Day Three – What do you call it? List several words and phrases that describe how you feel. Circle a few of them; connect any similar words or phrases with arrows. Put a star next to one or two that really speak to you. If the words escape you, draw a picture.
Your commitment is all it takes for the full seven-day Disposable Journal program to work. Simply find about twenty minutes each day and expressively write your answers to the questions. Imagine what it will feel like in a week when you’ve written it all out and let it go.
As the year begins to wind down Goal Season begins to heat up. Goal Season is the period between Thanksgiving Day, when people swear that next year they won’t eat so much, and continues through January, when people beat themselves up for not keeping their young resolutions.
Today, you may be feeling business or personal pressures to finish the year strong. If you already did your planning for 2010 in October, good for you. For the 97% of the rest of us, this is the time to plan anew.
What are you going to do make sure you achieve your next goal? First off, you need to want it, badly. If it’s not motivating to you, just how fun do you think it’s going to be to achieve? If you’re working on a goal that’s not fun, you should probably stop. Life is too short. So, what is it you want to do or have? Avoid mediocrity by making it a great goal. You should never be without a great goal.
It’s been said many times and in many ways; be sure your goal is S.M.A.R.T.
S – Make it specific. Broad goals decay quickly. Vague goals get vague results.
M – Make it measurable. You won’t achieve your goal with one grand action. It will take several little actions. It’s those little actions that you’ll want to measure. A little now, leads to a lot over time.
A – Make it attainable. Americans are an optimistic lot and think that anything they want is attainable. Because of this mindset, they nearly always get what they want. Stretch yourself, like a rubber band – but don’t overextend or you’ll snap.
R – Make it realistic. This has a direct correlation to your motivation. If you’re not realistic about your current skills, the resources you have, and what additional things you’ll need to reach your goal, you’re destined for some disappointment, and that would break my heart.
T – Make it timely. Getting squishy with time commitments will serve no one. Time is the silent accountability partner. It steadily ticks along, whether you’re ready or not.
Here’s a bonus tip. Make your goal positive in nature and phrase it in a way that causes the creation of something. Think about it; a goal to lose ten pounds sounds silly. Who makes it a goal to lose something? A goal is about scoring points. Get enough successful goals and you have a winning streak. It’d be better to be specific about the realistic and attainable weight you want to be on the date you think you can achieve that weight. Soon you’ll be creating a brand new you!
Okay, here’s another bonus tip. You could call it a “Bim-Bonus”: Having a goal to stop doing something will be less successful than a goal of starting to do something that is more important to you. Eventually the more important goal will replace the less important one.
If you need help finding, setting or getting your next great goal, give me a shout. It’s what I do.
I’m pleased to announce the launching of my new book, “How to Stay When You Want to Quit; Rescripting your life from whinner to winner”
“For all the little engines who have run out of steam. Take this book to the depot and rebuild your momentum.”
This is a story about two friends, Max and Madeline, who are pressing hard at their careers. Madeline is fortunate in she is now working with a great boss who has mentored and challenged her to be her best. Unfortunately, Max has had the opposite experience. He has been through a heavy rotation of managers, many of whom spoke a good game but never really showed up to play. The most noticeable difference between them is that Madeline, although not yet in her ideal job, loves the journey, while Max is miserable in his voyage.
Read on to learn how Madeline takes what she has learned and helps Max turn his attitude and his life around. You may pick up a few tips you could use to help bring positive action to people who are disillusioned in their jobs, even if that person is you.
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